This will be my last letter.
There's not much left to say. God has spoke to my heart, and it's time to leave the past behind and look to the future. You are no longer that little girl that you once were, and those memories will fade in time.
I am finished, except for the memoir that I plan on having published.
The girl Athena is gone. The adult Athena has taken her place, and she's not very nice.
I'm sure you don't care, and will probably make fun of these letters. That's what you do. It's okay though. I will be at peace. Will you?
Burying the past. Moving on.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Not much happening here. Fall is back, and of course Gracie likes her regular trips to the tennis courts to run. You remember when you and your dad would take her down to the tennis courts together? You loved doing that. We go to a different one now though, since we moved.
Memory of the day:
Remember when we all went to Indiana, and to Lake Michigan? I think it was your second time there, Lindsey's first. I remember how you loved to play in the water. Remember the piece of wood that your dad laminated and put pictures on for you? Do you still have it? He was always thinking about you.
Remember the 'care packages' he used to send you with all of your favorite things in? You're mom told your dad they were silly and that he shouldn't waste his time or money... that you just shoved the stuff under your bed. He tried, you have to give him credit for that. At least you know it all came from his heart....
|your dad, you and lindsey at lake michigan|
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Wow, what a video from your 18th birthday. Doesn't it embarrass you to talk that way? Why would you post this garbage? Do you not have any pride at all? If not, I suggest you go to your counselor at school and see if they can help. You need to to make things right in your heart, with God. If your not honest with anyone else, be right with Him and He will be your help.
This video you just put on...
Okay, enough of that.
Let's talk about the memory of the day:
This was right after your interview. Remember the fun? The laughing? Remember Gracie running away with your shoe? This is when we went upstairs and were talking. Remember how you kept telling me that your mom was unfair and selfish and that I didn't realize how she was? I remember. This was the last time I saw you. That was over four years ago.
One more memory for today:
Remember Dan's Rock? You and Lindsey were writing with a sharpie on the rock. It was a fun day!
Friday, October 29, 2010
Gracie sleeps on my lap as I write this. You remember Gracie, right? I hear you got a puppy of your own. I'm so happy for you. You did mention on youtube that your puppy is cuter than mine. LOL. I'm going to take that as a joke and not sarcasm, and wish you the best with your new puppy. She's adorable. I'm so glad you got yourself a puppy. Everyone should own a dog!
Your dad went once again to the doctor yesterday. If you don't understand what Crohn's disease is, let me sum it up by saying you get ulcers throughout your intestines and they swell, hurt, bleed and sometimes grow into other organs of your body and become life threatening. Your dad is at the stage where he bleeds a lot from his bowel. It's all stress. He's pretty high strung to begin with, and on top of that put the loss of Pop-pop in 2006 then the ongoing badgering from... well... you know what I'm talking about.
Okay, enough about us. Let's talk about the 'memory of the day'....
Remember when you, Lindsey, your Dad and I went to see Sweeny Todd, the play? We had so much fun that night. And you and Lindsey kept singing the Sweeny Todd song. LOL. You were sure smiling in admiration at whoever was taking this picture. That's right... it was your Dad taking the picture. You meant the world to him. So sad what happened....
Monday, October 25, 2010
Not much to say.
Just a memory of the day:
Just you and your Dad.
Remember how much you used to love him?
Sunday, October 24, 2010
We don't know much about what's going on with you these days. We send money for you every month, but that's about it. Don't hear anything... We wonder sometimes if you've ever realized what's happened to you. If you ever have come to the truth in your journey....
Here, things are moving right along. You're dad is very sick and not working anymore. I didn't know if you knew that or not.
Marissa, Lindseys little girl, spent the night with us on Friday. She's such a beautiful little thing. You would love her. She knows you through pictures and videos. She calls you Mathena. She'll always say, "I want to do it the way Mathena does it" or "I'm sliding down the slide the way Mathena does." It's so cute.
Memory for the day:
Ocean City Maryland...
Remember when we went and stayed in the trailer at the campsite at Fronteir Town? Remember just outside of our trailer was a pavilion where they'd show late night movies on a big screen? And have dancing? And ice cream nights where you could create your own sundae?
|You and your Dad after creating your Sundae|
|You and Lindsey at night outside. We told|
scary stories that night by the fire. Remember
the story of Miranda? LOL
|I'm pretty sure this was at Fronteir Town as well.|
Your dad had his 'vacation' shirt on. We
played miniature golf that night.
Monday, October 18, 2010
It's me again. You're Dad hasn't been feeling well lately. It's all the stress... but you don't really want to hear about that now do you? You really don't care about that stuff now. Your mind has been programmed to believe that he is not important to you. Okay.
Memory of the day:
Remember Indiana? This picture might jog your memory. Your dad fought the courts and your mom for years so that he could take you out there... You loved it. Really! You did!!
|You and your dad. |
You loved him at one time.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Wow, a lot of years are passing by since we last saw you. You're an adult now... though you're still in school. I'm sorry that you feel you have to make fun of me, and you're dad. I guess that's how you deal with us being absent from your life.
Anyway. Let's put that aside and pull up some memories from the past.
I remember the first months I met you. Getting to know you. You were so sweet. You loved to tell me about your cat, Tinker.
|We were at your Pop Pop's house|
We were all so happy and had such a great time when you'd come to stay with us. We missed you when you stopped coming.
|Lindsey and you...|
|You're dad, sure knows how to have a good time!|
Hopefully some day you will remember once again. And then your mind will be set free. And you will ask forgiveness for all you have done....
Hopefully it won't be too late.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Well, now that you're eighteen and no longer a 'child' I'm sure you must feel a little more independent.
I can remember when you begged your mom to let you come and live with us and wished you were old enough to make up your own mind. Do you remember that?
Do you remember how you used to cry when you had to leave us? That was before Dr. Jack Gerhard hypnotized you and planted the false memories.
I pray that you will someday remember your good life.
The one you left behind.
|You and Lindsey in the Pet Store. You girls|
always had such fun together.
|You will never find another who cared for|
you as much as your Dad did...
What a shame.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Last night I had a dream about you once again. Only this time you weren't young. You weren't sweet. You weren't innocent. You were... the person that you have become as a result of the parental alienation.
In my dream you were conceited, self centered, arrogant, crude, loud, and obnoxious... not to mention your filthy mouth that you brought to my subconscious as well.
At least my dreams have changed and the sweet little girl I once knew is gone. It's always sad to wake up to the reality of what happened then... Now it's easier.
Okay... memory of the day.... lest you've forgotten:
You're favorite shirt - The one you liked the best on your Dad. Do you remember?
I pray that someday you will be free of the awful lies that have been planted into your brain and in your heart. I pray that your heart will change, and you will be the girl you once were.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
You turned 18 last week. So how was that? Did you have any thoughts of contacting your Dad at all? I'm guessing not, since he didn't hear from you.
Just found this picture and it brought back a memory. Remember how you and your Dad would go on bike rides at the canal together? He loved that special time with you. This picture was of one of those special times.
You're Dad gave you his time, his heart and his love. It's a shame what happened.
Friday, April 2, 2010
I remember this day like it was yesterday. I had only known your Dad for a few months and I could see what a wonderful father he was. I'm not sure where we were this day. We were in town somewhere, and Lindsey and Stacy were with us. When it was time to go home you started to get sad, then you cried.
You always seemed sad when it was time to leave your Dad. Hopefully some day you can remember the truth about the first 13 years of your life. The ones where you were a part of your Father's life.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
It's Easter on Sunday and once again we are missing you and remembering that this was a time you would spend with us. You're dad was always excited months. He'd plan fun things for you to do and buy your favorite foods.
It was always a sad time when you would leave to go home. But your Dad would get past the sadness by making what he called 'picture books' for you and 'care packages' and send them. That was how he got through the sadness. You were sad too. But I guess you didn't know how to handle your sadness. You were only a kid.
Hopefully you will someday remember truth.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Every night I watch as your Dad searches online to see what's new with you. The once loving and nurturing Father is now a concerned, confused and defeated Dad. You're absence from his life has left him sick in despair, and wondering if you will ever come around and discover truth.
But you don't remember his love, do you Athena? You've been programmed to believe he didn't care...
You don't remember the sacrifices he made for you? The trips back and forth from Indiana to see you? The packages that he sent with all of your favorite things?
Do you remember telling him with tears falling from your face, "Dad, I just want to live with you,"?
"But Athena, I don't have the money your mother has. I couldn't give you what she gives you," he said.
"It's ok Dad, I don't care about all that stuff... I want to live with you." You answered.
Do you remember any of that?
Now you not only CARE ABOUT THAT STUFF.... but you care about it enough to falsely accuse your Dad of abuse.
Was it the hypnosis? The Bribery? The medications? Or are you just trying to survive being in a POW camp until you are freed?
Monday, March 29, 2010
I was just wondering. When you look back on the pictures of you and your dad together... don't you remember any of the truth at all? Do you remember how excited you used to be when you would come for your 'visitations' and how sad you were when it was time for you to go home? Can you remember how happy Gracie always was when you'd bounce into the house with backpack in hand, stooping down to greet her? Do you remember your dad, and his 'clipboard of fun things to do'? Bike rides along the canal. Taco's for dinner. Cici's your fave place to eat. Parasailing. Kite flying. Cool movie theatres on hot summer days along with popcorn, candy and coke. The fun at the 'Castle'. Dan's Rock. ???? Do you remember any of that? And then there is my fondest memory. It was bedtime... and I'd hear your dad praying with you. Praying for you.
What do you remember Athena? So much has happened since your mind seemed to be kidnapped and you took on the appearance of being a POW in your own home, brainwashed and without regard to truth. By the way. You're dad continues in prayer for you... even though he has not been allowed contact with you for years. You must remember his love???? The truth???? Pictures and video's do not lie, Athena. One day hopefully you can become 'unprogrammed' and know truth. Until then you are in everybody's prayers.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
It will be four years this June since you have been out of our life. I remember your last time with us and the video you made of 'your life so far'. That interview was great and I still have a copy of that dvd.
You may not remember, since you're mind and thoughts seem to have been kidnapped shortly after that visit... but you pleaded with your dad that you wanted to live with us at that time. You cried because you didn't want to go back home to your mother. You're dad told you there was nothing that he could do. He feels that was the day you gave up, and allowed them to do with you whatever they wanted.
I've wrote a book Athena, and it is not meant to do any harm... but to make an awareness to people as to what can be done to a childs mind when one parent decides that the other parent should not be in their childs life.
I had a dream about you again last night. I dream a lot about you. Last night you were with me and I was going to read you a story. You were five years old. A man in a uniform came and tried to take you away. But I wouldn't let him. Then when we walked upstairs to go into the house and there was another man in a different uniform sitting in the corner with his arms crossed. He was waiting for us. He came over and took you, and was taking you away when your dad came in and tried to stop him. You looked so sad. You're dad was fighting as hard as he could, but.... I'm not sure what happened in the end cause I woke up.
Hmmm wonder what meaning was behind that dream? Crazy, huh?